In the next few lines I am going to make you stop and say 'wow'. I will literally tear apart the fabric of time and space and single handedly destroy all matter. How? Well, I am going to, with the help of my alter ego Paddy O'Carrington reveal a startling revelation. One which beats all those boring revalations made in the Bible. I am going to show why the Matrix was right about reality.
INT. LOUNGEROOM - DAY
PADDY is sitting on the couch. Ben walks in.
PADDY:
Oh, hi Ben. How are you?
BEN: Shut up and listen.
PADDY:
Excuse me?
(BEN slaps PADDY)
BEN:
Shh.
PADDY:
Okay.
BEN:
I just had an efinapy.
PADDY:
A what?
BEN:
An efinapy.
PADDY:
I... I... a what?
BEN:
Efinapy. Are you deaf or just stupid.
PADDY:
I'm Irish.
BEN:
Oh.
PADDY:
Do you mean epiphany?
BEN:
No. Maybe.
PADDY:
Go on.
BEN:
Yeah. I just realised that all the world is false. A fake. A giant con.
PADDY:
And how did you figure that?
BEN:
Phisolophy.
PADDY:
Do you mean... oh never mind.
BEN:
I used logic.
PADDY:
Good for you.
BEN:
Mmm. You see:
Reality is what we perceive
Everybody perceives reality different
Therefore there can be no "One" reality, or the 'real' reality
PADDY:
Far out.
BEN:
Yeah baby. I just disproved life.
(PADDY claps appreciatively)
So there you go. I just proved reality is a false concept. Bet Einstein never did that. Bumming on with all his voodoo and Quasars and Quantum theory. All of it is simply his perception of the universe.
When i feel like it i'll post a article which explains what to do about this reality concept. If it is true then it would explain all kinds of funky stuff. More on that later but.
Aloha
(the goodbye aloha not the hello aloha. Now why are you still here. Go away. Shoo. Goodbye. Thank God I thought you'd never leave.)
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