WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING AT ME??

WHY DO PEOPLE INSIST ON WRITING THINGS ON THE INTERNET IN CAPS LOCK? IT IS ANNOYING AND MAKES ME FEEL AS THOUGH I AM BEING YELLED AT. IT IS ALSO INCREDIBLY HARD TO READ AT THREE IN THE MORNING. THE LETTERS ALL BLUR TOGETHER. IT IS ALSO NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE TO TELL WHERE ONE SENTENCE STOPPS AND THE NEXT BEGINS SO YOU READ IT ALL IN ONE BIG BREATH THEN COLLAPSE FROM OXYGEN DEPRAVATION. AND HERE'S A TEST, LOOK AWAY FROM THE SCREEN, THEN LOOK BACK AND SEE IF YOU CAN SPOT STRAIGHT AWAY WHERE YOU WERE READING FROM. WHAT IS EVEN WORSE IS WHEN PEOPLE START WRITING IN CAPS LOCK AND USING INTERNET ABBREVIATIONS.

WHAT DO U THNK OF MY POST? IT MADE ME ROFL AND THEN I HAD TO BBS IT 2 ALL MY PPL SO WE CLD ALL LOL 2GETHER AND BE HPY.

So please do not type in caps lock. if you do I will hate you forver.

Ciao

It's not smog... we swear!

Well, it's that time of year. The Olympics have started. A chance for all Australians to take a day off work and watch a bunch of sports we haven't seen since 2004. Sports like handball and rowing and fencing. But unlike Athens, with its sense of history and fun, Beijing just feels, well, not fun. Sure you have all the events and all the excitement of watching somebody ride a bike for six hours (I'm talking about you Cadel. You could have at least won and made it worth the wait, instead of letting some Spaniard no one ever heard of take the gold). But even I, the person who watched every stage of the Tour de France, found the Men's Cycling Road Race to be dreary. The Great Wall of China was a beautiful sight, when it poked through the thick layer of, err, "mist". And when the helicopter camera started filming sweeping aerial shots of the race, it looked as though the grey blob was overtaking the other grey blob. The "mist" was so thick you could barely see anything more than three kilometers away. Hows this for a random comparison, the Rockstar Videogame "Grand Theft Auto IV" has a longer draw distance (the distance you can see in game) than the visibility in Beijing during the Mens Road Race. I can't help but get the feeling the Chinese are contemplating arresting the smog, oops, err, "mist", for being a public nuisance. They already have plans to launch artillery shells into rain clouds should rain threaten Beijing. And, in a bizarre twist of fate, I am not being hyperbolic and exaggerative here, they really do have plans to launce artillery shells filled with chemical substances to make the water heavy, and therefore fall, long before it reaches Beijing. And that sums up the Chinese government in a nutshell. Complete authoritarian control over the people, the infrastructure, speech, thoughts and now Mother Nature. or "Mumsie N." as I like to call her. And if you think Beijing is bad with all its measures to keep cars of the road (some of which involve removing the cars, others involve removing the owners), and shutting down factories and displacing thousands, just wait until London. In 2012 when London gets to host the Games, some person, probably from France, decided it might be a good idea to go one step further that our friends in Beijing and actually NOT build any carparks. Thats right, whilst Beijing has removed the car, London has removed the parking spaces. This just means that there will be 12.7 million cars and no where to put them. I can see how that will work. But, as always there is good. Beijing is still a great place and the Olympics are still fun to watch, when you can see through all that "mist" that is. And London will be cool. It will be better if the world wasn't supposed to end in December 2012... but more on that some other time.

P.S
One day I will remember the importance of paragraphs. But today, at three in the arvo witha slight hangover a slab was just so much more attractive.